I'm No Longer Interested in Ruminating

I spent years during and after my marriage ruminating on how shitty things were, how shitty my relationships were, and how shitty the people who wanted to control me were, and I’m no longer interested in doing that.

While I see endless posts on social media (particularly Instagram and in Facebook groups) about the situations, toxic patterns, and abuses that narcissistic people inflict upon others, I know that going down that rabbit hole of “us empaths or normal people” vs. “those abusive, narcissistic people” isn’t going to help me heal.

There is surely value in bringing light to these dynamics and calling them out so that I can educate myself and help educate others. It’s important for us to see what’s going on and to raise awareness so that if we find ourselves in these dynamics we can do what it takes to heal.

But that’s what I want to emphasize: healing, and doing what it takes to heal.

Focusing on how terrible other people are and how terribly they treat us is keeping the focus on them and is not conducive to our own healing. In fact, it’s continuing to give them our power.

Becoming aware and taking the steps to heal and loving ourselves through the process of moving forward is what empowers us to live the peaceful lives that we crave in the wake of the tumult and turmoil that we endure when we’re engaged in toxic relationships.

So, now that I’m aware (and helping to raise awareness consistently) I’m now primarily focused on the healing, self-loving and nurturing, and thriving process.

Because I’d rather be present in (and growing with) the healthy relationships now— the ones that I have spent time cultivating.

And being in a place now, where I can enjoy these healthy relationships, started with me loving myself first.

Loving myself enough to leave old toxic dynamics. Loving myself enough to notice when old patterns emerge now, and loving myself enough to create new reference points for relationships.

Relationships that are supportive.

Relationships that feel good.

That’s what I’m interested in.

Never forget this: you are valuable, you are a powerful cosmic force, and you are SO loved.

Korynn xx

Move on from the toxicity.

Start the healing, self-loving, and thriving process for healthy relationships.